...Just Because

I realize that I’m getting older and I’m okay with that. I just don’t get bent out of shape about stuff like that. Because really, life is not measured by the number of breaths you take, but rather by the moments that take your, right?

Well, I’ve got a new appreciation for the older ladies and gents in my life now. The ones who take off a few years when someone asks their age. The ones who see a fellow mid-lifer and inquire softly, under their breath to me, “Do I look younger than her?”

I appreciate these people now…I appreciate and understand because I have watched the Bachelor. I remember when this show first came on TV so many years ago and I thought the ladies were so much older…and so much wiser and cooler. And now, staring at myself from the other side of the glass, I think… “I’m older than these ladies (though not by much)…and I’m certainly not cooler…wiser, yes…yes, I will give myself that.”

These ladies are my age if not younger and they are vying for this prince’s affections for him to fall in love with and marry them. Ladies, doesn’t this seem a little belittling? Demeaning? Behind the times, even? I certainly think it does.

But I’m not going to lie to you. I have watched and been entertained by two, maybe three episodes. What’s really entertaining though, is seeing the commercials and then the show…because they are always totally different.

Anyway, sorry. Back to what I was writing about.

I had a semi-out-of-body experience the other morning. I was driving to work. Listening to talk radio. Drinking a coffee with one hand and driving with the other. I had on my “big girl” clothes – a black pencil skirt, button down shirt and my fancy designer, favorite stilettos. It was then that I saw myself as I used to see people like me when I was 12 or 16 or 21…

She’s old.

I do old things. I’m older. I own my home, I own my car, I have a cat that is well nourished and plants that thrive. I work full-time, M-F, 8-5 and only miss work when I absolutely have to. I worry about retirement and savings and the future. And I am in grad school…which more often times than not makes me feel older too.

And I date. And when you date at this age, people feel better if they think you are serious about the person whom you are dating. For some reason, they need to know that you see a future…because otherwise…they think you are wasting your time. Or that your eggs are going to go bad. Or that I’m “not getting any younger.”

But then I think… “Slow down there! I’m only 24.” I mean, I know time flies at this age…but I just need a brake. I need a brake from the pressures of going older. I need to be young again. To take playtime seriously. To feel the cold, wet grass underneath my feet. To take the time to smell the sweet air of morning…because that is my favorite time of day. To wake up early and go to bed late…just because. To not worry about working out and staying fit. And eating right. And doing the most mature thing.

I want to throw a temper tantrum. Laugh until I physically can’t laugh anymore because my sides are streaming out in pain. I want to sneak into movies in the middle of the afternoon

And most of all I want to remember everyday how fast time goes…and that I am not guaranteed one more minute. And to act like a kid every once in a while…just because.

Yeah...

Just so you know...This whole not having a car thing...

It's really wearing on my every-last-loving nerve!

But! Grey's is tonight! Thank God for little miracles.

I'm going to a haunted house on Saturday and am already scared. I told someone that I might poop my pants...

She told me to stop by K-Mart to get some Depends before I left.

That really has nothing to do with anything, but at the moment, I am waiting for my dad to pick me up at work.

Yeah...

Just sittin' here...

Counting the days that pass me by... (it's a Michelle Branch song...)

One that I tortured myself with for a long time. If you go through a break-up, this is the song for you. It's strong and "I'll pick myself back up" oriented...and yet sad and depressive. Just the elements that every good break-up song should consist of.

Disturbing...and yet expected

I think quite a few people might be disturbed by the findings in this article by the New York Times.

A statistic that I found particularly disturbing was that more parents thought their child had most likely experienced sex while on drugs or alcohol than thought their child had bought porn.

Most of those surveyed were in the 11th and 12th grades and were between the ages of 16-17. Most had not had sex, stating they were waiting for the right person and/or until they were older. Silver lining?

One girl, aged 17 stated her reason for not having had sex this way, "No particular reason, I'm not like a Christian or anything." Looks like we have a reputation...

Boy, 14 stated "I don't think you should have sex in the 9th grade. Probably 10th." Yes, because so much changes...

Boy, 18 "My father tells me stories about his youth and scolds me for not having as much sex as he did." Nice, what a good father...

A mother of an 18 year old girl, "I talk about disease. Never talk about pleasure: It encourages them." Okay...somebody's sex drive is going to be screwed up...

Adult Twister?

Twister has drastically improved its odds at getting adults to play.

Aqualung Anti-Christ

Well, as you, my loyal and attentive reader may recall, I went to the Fray concert at the Ryman Auditorium on Thursday.

I was super excited and could barely breathe.

The concert and the boys of the Fray ever exceeded my teenage girl'ish expectations and desires. Anyway...here's how the night progressed.

Abi and I met Chris and his girlfriend, Lisa, at Ru San's and dined on some exquisite sushi. Again, I know I mentioned this before, but if you have not eaten here, you really should. Lisa isn't the biggest fan of raw fish and she really enjoyed herself...or at least I think she did!

On to the concert!

We get there and the opener's opener is playing. So, no one I've heard of. We get settled into our seats (eh hem...pew) and try to think if there are any last minute things we need to take care of. Bathroom, check. Phone calls, check. Food, check. Beverage, check. We're good!

Aqualung comes on. I'm excited, I like Aqualung. Not nearly as much as the Fray...but like them nonetheless. They're playing and surprisingly, everyone continues to talk, walk around and get situated. They play for a good 30 minutes and then...all Hell broke loose.

Abi and I are sitting about six inches apart we're minding our own business (as all good stories start), chatting it up (like everyone else in the audience), when there comes a massive pounding in between us on our wooden pew. Whack! Whack! Whack!

In the seconds that followed, Abi and I both thought that this Whack! must have come from someone we knew. I mean we are that popular. Surely, it was someone saying something along the lines of, "Oh my gosh! I didn't notice that was you right there? How excited are y'all for the show?! Me too! Hehehe!"

Nope.

We turn around. Smiles broad showing our big toothy grins. And this is what greets us...

"Ladies! I didn't pay $60 for these tickets to hear you bitches talk the whole time, so shut up!"

Seriously, I thought my jaw had dropped to the floor before...but relative to what I experienced Thursday night...well, those times were nothing. It seems like it took Abi and I an eternity to finally turn around and come to terms with what just happened. First off, I was called a bitch seriously for the first time in my life. Second off, I had to come to terms with the fact that I let some nobody tell me what to do.

Oh - I was furious! Probably more mad that I have been, oh ever! I start thinking of all the things that I could/should have said back to her. For instance, "When are you going to tell all the other 'bitches' in here to shut-up. Go ahead. We're waiting. You've got a lot of area to cover, oh yeah, that's right...because everyone else in here is talking!

But I didn't.

I just leaned into Abi so the Aqualung Anti-Christ couldn't see her beloved band. Then I whispered to Abi, "You have got to be kidding me."

Abi's response? It was priceless. "Don't talk to me. Don't talk to me." Oh Abi. She's one that I always wanted in a fight. I was sure that she would beat someone in my honor. But no. The Aqualung Anti-Christ got to her and I must be honest, she was extremely scary. This story is not to be taken lightly.

Well, I heard the guy that was with her say something about, "I can't believe you garble de gook." To which her response was something like, "Don't defend them! I came to hear the music, not those bitches."

So, there was only one more song when that song ended. One More! If she could have just held out one more song, she wouldn't have had to have been the Aqualung Anti-Christ! But she didn't. The break before the Fray came and I got up and looked directly at her and her "boyfriend" (to whom I hope to God is not her boyfriend today). Neither one of them would make eye contact with me. Neither one. They were both too embarrassed. Probably her for her heat of the moment actions and him for his significant other. Choose more wisely next time, buddy. She wasn't even cute.

So, long story short, I knew a friend up in the balcony and Abi and I broke in up there. It was fantastic and Hank, if you're reading this - thanks for helping us score those seats!

Here are some pictures from that night.

Missing Grey's Tonight...

...Because I'm going to see the Fray and Aqualung! People...I am so excited!

SO excited!

I am sitting here at work about to burst out of my skin. I'm going to the concert with my friend Abi and we're meeting two of my friends for dinner and drinks beforehand. I'm thinking Ru San's. Will have to get the groups consensus on this matter, however.

I think our seats suck...but deep down, I am excited about being in the same room as these bands. Sharing their air. Perhaps I will happen to breathe in some of the air they exhale.

Gross - I'm really not psychotic. Just incredibly excited! I've already said that though, right? Yeah, I did.

So Grey's will have to wait. I'll have to record it. That's right, I said record it...like on video tape. I haven't moved to the whole DVR/Tivo thing. I don't even have cable or internet. Thank God Grey's is on ABC!

I'll probably cry when the Fray plays "Look After You." Ahhh...probably my favorite song of theirs.

Smiles and happiness to everyone. Lord knows I have enough to go around!

What City Should You Live In?

DP clued me in on this test awhile back and I took it again...It changed only slightly...

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Your personality type is SCUAI

You are social, calm, unstructured, accommodating, and moderately intellectual, and may prefer a city which matches those traits.

The largest representation of your personality type can be found in the these U.S. cities: Providence, Austin, Denver, Salt Lake City, Charlotte, San Antonio, Albuquerque/Santa Fe, Indianapolis, Phoenix, Portland/Salem, Nashville, Louisville and these international countries/regions Turkey, Croatia, Slovenia, Caribbean, Puerto Rico, Iceland, Norway, Ukraine, Sweden, Denmark, Spain, Netherlands, Russia, Japan, India

What Places In The World Match Your Personality?
City Reviews at CityCulture.org

It gives you personality traits too. Here are mine:

life of the party, not bothered by disorder, not afraid of doing the wrong thing, often late, level emotions, not afraid to draw attention to self, worry free, people loving, prefers unpredictable to organized, fearless, not apprehensive about new encounters, likes philosophical discussions, disorganized, not easily annoyed, not a perfectionist, enjoys danger, comfortable in unfamiliar situations, anxiety free, always joking, not very private, very curious, not embarrassed easily, adventurous, flexible, narcissistic, trusting, easy to get to know, easy to satisfy, likes crowds, ready to act on the spot, not a bad loser, outgoing, thrill seeker, not easily discouraged, optimistic, laid back, open to new experience, slow to judge others, thinks fun is the most important think in life, socially skilled, easily talked into doing silly things, rarely prepared, willing to take risks, adjusts easily, passionate about causes, willing to explain things twice, spontaneous, relaxed, believes in universal harmony, eager to soothe hurt feelings

Online Dating Profile

I just wasted a good portion of my night looking at online profiles on Match.com. No, I am not a member, but I did create a fake membership to check all the people out. Surprisingly, I knew a lot of people on there! I suppose I shouldn’t be surprised…I don’t know, I just am.

So, in the spirit of the night I am going to write my own personal ad.

About Me:

Native Alabaman, current Tennessean. I love my friends and I love my family. I like the beach and the mountains. I graduated from high school and from college. My hair is brown and so are my eyes. I’m short and I have small hands and feet. I seem to able to balance just fine, considering this fact, though I would not consider myself graceful. I like to drink water and I limit my carbonated beverages. I like chicken and I like music. Generally, this is not a normal pairing…but I am reminded of the funky chicken as you should be. I don’t sleep enough, but when I do, I most always dream. I don’t always remember them though…but I’m sure they are good. I have a cat. He’s pretty cool. Please don’t call him a her just because he’s a cat and cats seem female to you. He is every bit as masculine as you. I like dating. Dating. When did dating stop, might I ask? When did it become appropriate to get together and rent a movie on a Saturday night? We are both not heinous – let’s go out and be seen together. Unless of course you have a girlfriend…or wife…

Seriously, I have gotten onto another subject and I am feeling the need to go on and on.

Dating – When did it become okay to just hang out? Why are there no more DTR (Defining the Relationship) talks? I just don’t get it. Where are the boys that want to date and court me? I don’t want to hang out with you! I want to date you. And guys, don’t say that you don’t have any money to date. That’s a whole load of crap. You do…you just blew it last weekend at the bar. And at the game. And on that new video game, or whatever it is that you boys play these days. Seriously, you have a job…does it pay you money? I sure as heck hope so, cause otherwise you are in more trouble that I thought. And on that note. Let’s say you are poor and you do work for free. There are tons of cool things to do that don’t cost much (if any) money. Some of the best, most creative dates I have been on weren’t “wine and dine me” dates. If a girl truly likes you boys, it doesn’t matter what you spend, what matters is that you have a good time together and get to know one another.

But I am an able-bodied young woman. I want to go out. I want to go hiking (last I checked, nature was free). I want to go to the park (again, free) and cook-out (seriously, if you can’t buy food, again…problems). I want to go and get coffee (depending on where you go…about $3 or less/person) with you and talk about what makes you who you are…and of course myself because doesn’t every girl like to talk about herself…at least that’s what I hear we girls are supposed to like. I want to get up a group of people and play board games (I have a ton…in the magic words…free for you). For God’s sake though boys, unless I am sick and want to stay at home and you are being sweet and coming over to take care of me…please, can we go out? I’m sitting on my couch right now…I can and will do this with or without you. And honestly, I prefer without. Well, that’s a little harsh…It’s just that, well, we barely know each other…It’s all happening so fast with us.

Oh and please call and ask me before hand. Please call and make plans…in advance. Not the day before…even though that has become acceptable in the recent years. But certainly not the night of. Oh my gosh, and don’t even think about texting me and asking me where I am when you haven’t asked me out. I will not meet you out and do not interrupt my night with the people that I am out with. I made plans without you...now leave me alone. Now, this is assuming that you and I don’t already have a relationship. Once the relationship has been built, the foundations laid, this is perfectly acceptable behavior. You have a life. I have a life. Everything will be fine as long as we both understand this.

Seriously, ladies. Let’s start a revolution. No advance plans, no dates. Period.

Tim and Faith! Tim and Faith!

Okay, I’m not one of those people that gets star-struck easily. Living in Nashville, we see country music stars quite often…so there’s no reason to get our panties in a wad over it. Recently, it seems as if Nashville is the cool place to be. It’s like an oasis for the Hollywood crowd. I mean, freakin’ Kid Rock moved here. Kid Rock, Pam Anderson, Katherine Heigel (Izzy from Grey’s Anatomy), Nicole Kidman…that’s all I can think of at the moment.

All this to say, that I have never been the slobbering “Oh my gah…it’s like totally a star…right there, look! Ahhh! I can barely stand it!”

Let me tell you where I just was. You’ll never believe it…okay, maybe you will…

I was just at a movie screening of Tim McGraw’s new movie, Flicka…with Tim McGraw and Faith Hill sitting a few rows back. Ahhh! I can barely stand it! Okay, Tim…take him or leave him. He seems like a nice guy…but Faith! Hello woman crush! She seems like such a genuine person. She has a handsome husband who loves and dotes on her, her children are absolutely gorgeous, oh yeah…and she is incredibly talented and beautiful.

I was able to go to this due to my wonderful friend, Abi, who works for his label. Fabulous!

So, Tim McGraw’s “Number One Fan” was there. (All persons shall remain nameless). She told us when Tim was making his way by, “If he talks to any of you, you have to introduce me. I don’t care what you’re talking about…find a way to segue to me.” Well, shocking to all I’m sure…Tim didn’t stop to talk to us.

After the show we all stood out in the lobby giving NOF the run down of what Tim was doing at that exact moment.

“Okay, he’s facing us now.”

“Okay, Faith is walking this way but Tim is still over there.”

“Ohhh! Ohhh! They are both walking this way! They’re coming!”

And there they came. NOF turns, grabs Tim’s arm and says:

“I just want to thank you for being so wonderful.”

What?! Haha – Oh NOF!

Tim thanks her and walks off…like it is completely normal for people to thank him for being born everyday. Yeah…not something on my daily agenda. Brush teeth, check. Bathe, check. Feed the cat, check. Be idolized, check, check.

Technorati Profile

Changes!

You may have noticed somethings are different around these parts...you may not have.

Either way...

The changes were made!

It's kind of like a facelift. Only without the scalpels, investment, pain, and healing time.

Hope you like it like a muskrat loves plum goodies!

Halloween Costume?

I can't decide what to be! I'm going to Ohio to visit my friend Michael...SO I was thinking that we could go as Tom and Katie!


His response? "Gross...Cooties!" I thought it would be hilarious! But apparently not.

Michael came up with an idea as well...It only needs one picture...


I nixed it pretty quick. I'm for one not Amazonian. Brigitte is like 6'1 or something...ginormous.

What do yall think? What should I be for Halloween?

Other thoughts from various unnamed contributors were:






I still like Tom and Katie...and that requires no costume...just a bun in the oven... :)

Too much time on my hands...

Perhaps...

Sunday Woes

Last night, I picked up my friend Abi from the airport. She had visited her family in North Carolina and was coming in from a relaxing weekend. Abi called me when her flight landed and I headed off to the airport to play the good friend role.

The airport was really crowded last night for some bizarre reason; then again, maybe it always is and I just never fly so I wouldn’t know. So I circled once. I got back around and Abi still wasn’t there. I circled again. Still not there…so I decided to see if anyone would notice if I lingered in the unloading zone. Well, the Parking Nazi did…and he was about 80 years old…but he was scary…don’t be fooled by outward appearances or age. With a stiff finger and several tense moves he directed me out of my spot and there I was, circling again.

Abi called to let me know they had lost her luggage. They weren’t exactly sure where it was, but it was indeed lost. So, while she talked with the airline about next steps I waited in my car in the waiting area…without the Nazi.

I was given word about 10 minutes later that Abi was on her way out. I went to meet her. She was, needless to say, a tad vexed. I tired to comfort her in the best way I knew how…”Um, it could be worse…” which is never helpful.

We started on our way to drop her off at her car, which was parked at her office. While en route I kept hearing this buzzing noise. I thought perhaps there was some sort of large beetle or *scary* some sort of biting/stinging inset. But it sounded like it was coming out of my dash board. From the inside. I turned on the blinker and it stopped.

Seconds later, the ABS light came on and then the Airbag light came on, followed by the Check Engine light. Awesome. Well, all I had to do was make it home, right. Right. So, we’re trucking on down I 4-40. We get on 1-65 N and the radio goes off. Silence. Then the interior console lights go off. Now I can’t see how fast I’m going. Though it sure is a blessing not seeing all those glaring lights shining back at me telling me to check things that I don’t know what are. As long as I’ve got headlights, right. Right.

Then they go off. Awesome. I’m traveling down the interstate not knowing how fast I’m going and without headlights…and also with an expired tag.

I called my parents because they always know what to do. Always. Of course, as usual, they did. We made our plan and Abi and I continued on to her office. We were pulling up to the gate at her building and I had to put my window down to enter in the key code. Yeah…the whole electrical thing wasn’t working so well…but the window finally did go down. Just didn’t so go back up so well. The distance from the gate to Abi’s car is about 75 feet. In this time, Abi asks me…”Do you think you’ll make it back to my place, or do you think you should just leave your car here?”

“Oh, I think I’ll make it. Just make sure to follow behind me.”

Then my car starts sputtering. And it dies. Right there. Rolling into a parking space.

Poor little Jetta. She made it as long as she could.

So, here I am again. Carless and at the mercy of others.

Only now, I’m out of a warranty. Perhaps because it was an existing condition they will help me out again. And by help out, I mean pretend to fix things while scratching their asses.

Oh, I’m sorry.

And yet, not really.