Have you seen this?

In short, AshleyMadison.com assists married people in finding others to have affairs with. So, it's like Match.com for cheating...

While 90 percent of me is totally disgusted at the thought, the other 10 percent is intrigued at not only the business model but also with the ethics behind it.

In your opinion, should these sites be allowed to exist? I don't think it's anyone right to govern or decide what my morals should be...but I also don't like the thought of websites tailoring to such a lack of moral judgment (of course, in my opinion) - making it easy for people to cheat on their spouses.

The site's been getting quite a lot of media attention. Check some of it out here. Noticeable appearance on Ellen, the Tyra Banks Show and Good Morning America.

What are your thoughts?

Take notes! Lessons on how to be the perfect girlfriend.

How to be the perfect girlfriend... This brings the laughs and is, per my understanding, quite true... :-)


Guys, what do you think?


What makes the "perfect" girlfriend?

Did y'all hear about this??

New York Girl of My Dreams

He's all over the internet and TV. Just Google him, you'll see... :)

Also, as an aside - he's from Nashville and went to Hume Fogg....

Personality Test

It's been awhile since I took the Myer's Briggs personality test and low and behold, I'm still the same.

Your Type is
ENFJ

Extraverted	Intuitive	Feeling	Judging
Strength of the preferences %
22	12	38	44

If you want, take your test here. Comment back what you are. I'd love to know.

Here's a little about my type, you know...just in case you're interested!

• ENFJs are energetic, enthusiastic, and very aware of others. Their genuine interest can usually draw out and involve even the most reserved person. They listen to and support others, but also have a very definite values and opinions of their own, which they will express clearly. ENFJs are energized by people and are socially adept; however, they also have a strong need for authentic, intimate relationships.
• Abstract in their thought and speech, cooperative in their style of achieving goals, and directive and expressive in their interpersonal relations.
• Especially capable of educing or calling forth those inner potentials each learner possesses. Even as children this type may attract a gathering of other children ready to follow their lead in play or work. And they lead without seeming to do so.
• Expect the very best of those around them, and this expectation, usually expressed as enthusiastic encouragement, motivates action in others and the desire to live up to their expectations. This type has the charming characteristic of taking for granted that their expectations will be met, their implicit commands obeyed, never doubting that people will want to do what they suggest. And, more often than not, people do, because this type has extraordinary charisma.
• Found in no more than 2 or 3 percent of the population. They like to have things settled and arranged. They prefer to plan both work and social engagements ahead of time and tend to be absolutely reliable in honoring these commitments.
• Values harmonious human relations above all else, can handle people with charm and concern, and are usually popular wherever they are. But Teachers are not so much social as educational leaders, interested primarily in the personal growth and development of others, and less in attending to their social needs.
• And here's a really good site describing ENFJs that I won't burden you with here.
  

So, take the test. Tell me what you are!

U.K. Schoolgirl Looses "Virginity Ring" Battle

So, so sad.

LONDON - A teenager whose teachers had stopped her wearing a “purity ring” at school to symbolize her commitment to virginity has lost a High Court fight against the ban.

Lydia Playfoot, 16, says her silver ring is an expression of her faith and had argued in court that it should be exempt from school regulations banning the wearing of jewelry.

“I am very disappointed by the decision this morning by the High Court not to allow me to wear my purity ring to school as an expression of my Christian faith not to have sex outside marriage,” Playfoot said in a statement Monday.

Playfoot’s legal challenge was the latest in a series of disputes in British schools in recent years over the right of pupils to wear religious symbols or clothing, such as crucifixes and veils.

Playfoot’s parents are key members of the British arm of the American chastity campaign group the Silver Ring Thing, a religious group which urges abstinence among young people.

Those who sign up wear a ring on the third finger of the left hand. It is inscribed with “Thess. 4:3-4,” a reference to a Biblical passage from Thessalonians which reads: “God wants you to be holy, so you should keep clear of all sexual sin.”

Lawyers for the school denied discrimination and said the purity ring breached its rules on wearing jewelry.

They said allowances were made for Muslim and Sikh pupils only for items integral to their religious beliefs and that, for the same reason, crucifixes were also allowed. But it argued that the purity ring was not an integral part of the Christian faith.

Owner of a Lonely Heart...

Yes...
(hahaha)

Japanese men are finding it increasingly difficult to partner with a women that will please them. So...as any natural person would do, they turn not to dating sites or prostitutes...but to plastic.

Plastic sex dolls.

These dolls are life like and are anatomically correct and range in price from $800-$5,500 a piece. The more expensive models are made of silicone (more life-like and have, get this, 35 movable joints).

Please read the attached article...it makes me really sad for this one guy who goes by "Ta - Bo".

"Each has a name. Ta-Bo often watches television with his toys before bathing them, powdering them so that their skin feels more human, dressing them in lingerie and then taking them to bed.

'A human girl can cheat on you or betray you sometimes, but these dolls never do those thing. They belong to me 100 percent,' says the engineer who has spent more than 2 million yen ($16,000) over the past decade on the dolls."

Poor Ta - Bo! He has three of them lined up on his couch when he returns home...then he bathes them and powders them.

He has obviously been cheated on in the past.

Ta - Bo, not everyone cheats! I promise. You have to pick up the pieces, man. Date women. Real ones that don't come from a factory or a company. And don't advertise the number of movable parts they have.

There's a girl out there for you. Don't give up hope. Seriously, these were originally meant for handicapped men....but whatever floats your boat.

Obviously Ta - Bo wanted some girl to "belong" to him and do whatever he wanted her to. He likes the silent, submissive type. Those kinda girls might be difficult to find.

Well, I guess he found one. Scratch that...he found three of them. Until his next paycheck and he can buy more. Whoo Hoo!

Apology for all the sex/preggers articles...

But here's one more. I need to get my mind on other things today!

NY Times - Positive Trends for Today's Teens

Take Aways:
*The teenage birthrate hit a record low. The teenage birth rate in 2005 was 21 per 1,000 young women ages 15 to 17 — an all-time low. Comparatively, the rate in 1991 was 39 births per 1,000 teenagers.

*In 2005, 47 percent of high school students — 6.7 million — reported having had sexual intercourse, down from 54 percent during the 12 years between 1991-2003

*Of those who reported having had sex during a three-month period in 2005, 63 percent — about 9 million — said they used condoms. That is an increase from the 46 percent reported in 1991.

“I think the H.I.V./AIDS epidemic and the efforts in the ’80s and ’90s had a lot to do with that,” Mr. Wagoner said of the improved numbers on teenage sexual activity, condom use and births. “We need to encourage young teens to delay sexual initiation, and we need to make sure they get all the information they need about condoms and birth control”.

Honestly, I just can't imagine 54 percent having sex in high school. I mean, I know they did...and I know that I was sheltered...but come on! None of my girlfriends had sex back then and not many of my guy friends did as far as I know...and I am pretty sure they would have talked/bragged about it...because I got to hear everything else. Whatever, though. Perhaps I was just friends with the other 46 percent.

Also, this brings up the condom issue. Thank God the number of teenagers using condoms is going up.

I understand that it might be embarrassing to look for and perhaps even, buy condoms. But don't be stupid.

If it's the cost, suck it up. Your $5 dollars (or whatever condoms cost) is a lot cheaper than caring for a child. And after all, you think you are old enough to have sex, therefore you are old enough to have a job and pay for your condoms.

If it is the embarrassment, you should only be embarrassed if you look like a baby about to engage in a sexual act...which you probably do because you're in high school. Even still, you need protection. I would imagine that going to the doctor to find out that you had herpes and/or gonorrhea would be pretty embarrassing too...only it lasts a lot longer than your check-out with the other pimple-faced teenager at Target.

And that concludes my rant...sorry if it offends... :)

Why do you do it?

A recent research study found 235 reasons why people get it on between the sheets.

My mom read my blog...

...you know, the one about decisions. Well, she had a few things to say, tried to post them but couldn't quite get the knack of posting a comment down...

Well, ladies and gentlemen, here is my mom's response to "Decisions". I have the best mom...ever (Hi, mom!).

"First and foremost, in this life, the only life we will have, I want you to be incredibly happy, self fulfilled, motivated, assured of your decisions, creative, and, believe that no matter which route you chose, as long as you are happy, that I will be completely happy. And, that will be because you have found yourself and are satisfied within yourself. After all, that is what happiness is. It's not how much money you make, but, if you are happy in doing what you do in life and with the money you make can you do the things that bring you happiness. It's a blend.

And, as to having children...that is absolutely personal. Not everyone can be a mother, or do a good job at it, or even want to be. I don't believe when I was in my teens Iwas ever even asked that question or even considered whether or not I did or did not want to be a mother...I just was. It was just there, maybe, even expected. I don't know, I just never really thought about it. However, later, I did. I wanted to be a mother...it was a choice, a decision. I know I made the right choice...because you are here. And, oh, how I love you. But, I will assuredly not be disappointed if you choose not to have children in any fashion..that is your choice. I love you just the way you are. With or without grandchildren. That is truly how I feel.

And, if you were a barrista... were happy, taught yoga , lived your dream, were safe, and I could be a part of your life that would make me complete. That is truly how I feel. I want you to feel free to be you. That is why I value education so much. It helps you to see "outside the box"; to find out what is in this huge wonderful world that I have no clue of; to teach me new and wonderful things....we are never too old to learn, to create, to change...never.

I am happy that you found role models that establish interesting concepts to be included in the person you are...just me would have never been enough. I knew from an early age that you were going to be and are gifted and that I could only go so far with what I knew. You know so much and are growing smarter every day...and, I hope to learn as much as I can from you. I do believe we will always learn from one another. Maybe in different ways. I have been many places in my lifetime...and learned a lot from just living...that you can't get from a book. And, you have been places I have not been....so, we both learn. Everyday."

The Luckiest

Have you ever had that one song, poem, quote…that one thing that was able to put into words…that was able to capture the essence of what you’ve felt, what you’ve bumbled though…what you want?

That’s the way the song “The Luckiest” by Ben Folds is to me. I’ve always loved it, but rediscovered it when I found my CD stashed away in a box from when I moved.

Anyway, my favorite parts of the lyrics follow. Enjoy!

I don't get many things right the first time
In fact, I am told that a lot
Now I know all the wrong turns, the stumbles and falls
Brought me here
And where was I before the day
That I first saw your lovely face?
Now I see it everyday
And I know
That I am
The luckiest

And in a wide sea of eyes
I see one pair that I recognize
And I know
That I am
The luckiest

I love you more than I have ever found a way to say to you
Next door there's an old man who lived to his nineties
And one day passed away in his sleep
And his wife; she stayed for a couple of days
And passed away
I'm sorry, I know that's a strange way to tell you that I know we belong
That I know
That I am
The luckiest

Ruth Graham passes away

Now, I haven't followed her life and I don't know much about her; however, watching her story this morning and listening to who she was and how she will be remembered touched my heart.

Watch the story here and here.

Billy Graham - "I am so grateful to the Lord that He gave me Ruth, and especially for these last few years we’ve had in the mountains together. We’ve rekindled the romance of our youth, and my love for her continued to grow deeper every day. I will miss her terribly and look forward even more to the day I can join her in Heaven.”

Ruth was asked in an interview with Diane Sawyer back in the 90's about the secret to her marital success. She responded that a Chinese writer once wrote that "In the West (America), marriage starts at a boil and gradually cools. In the East, marriage starts cool and gradually reaches a boil."

Perhaps that was their secret.

Decisions

I caught up with my friend Tiffany last night and we talked about many of the issues that concern (see also - bother) us on a regular basis.

As women, we are stuck in very difficult situations. We are forced, rather encouraged, to consider so many different and conflicting influences before making decisions that concern our lives. The key word there is our lives. The decisions that I choose are mine and mine only. At least at this juncture…

Whatever we, as women, choose to do is met by scrutiny, admonishment and scorn by one side or another. If I choose to get married, I am subscribing to archaic rules and values. Wasn’t I aware that women could make it solo? Perhaps I was, but didn’t want to go it alone…perhaps I wanted someone to share it with a long the way. And if I don’t want to get married, well, then naturally I am a career-ambitious bitch who doesn’t value family or family values.

Then there is the issue of children. Do I want them? Does he? If I decide I don’t want them and he does, is that a deal breaker? I tested the waters the other night while having dinner with my mom and dad.

“I don’t think I want to have kids,” I said to my mom.

“Sure you do, sweetheart! You’ve always wanted kids!”

“Yeah, I did. But I was younger then. Maybe I’m just not cut out for them. What if I’m a bad mom? And isn’t the world already populated enough?”

“Sarah, you’ll want kids when the time comes. You’re just in a phase right now.”

Yeah…that’s it, I’m in a phase. I think what she meant was, “Sarah, you’ll want to have kids…because I want you to have kids…and I’m your mother and mother knows best…”

Perhaps.

I don’t know. It sometimes just seems that no matter what side I choose, someone winds up disappointed. And I wonder, why can’t people just back out or pitch in and just make the decisions for me.

It would be a lot easier.

Sometimes I long for a simpler time. When there was only one car, a Ford, and it only came in one color, black. A time when women got married and had children early and they were “happy”…at least on the surface.

But I think they were happy. I think, maybe they didn’t know any different…maybe they didn’t know they were unhappy. Being married and having kids was what they were supposed to do and that was supposed to make them happy. They didn’t have a choice. The grass can’t be greener on the other side if another side doesn’t exist, right?

These days women actually have to figure out what makes them happy amid swirls of dissension. Thanks, women’s lib! Thanks a lot.

And this makes me think about my job and what I do, toiling day in and day out over what really are absolute frivolities.

I work to have money because I am scared to be poor. I work five days a week so that I have money to do something on the two days that I have off. I am working to contribute to the “system” because that is what I am supposed to do…this is what is supposedly good and respectful.

So then I think, what I really want to do is finish my degree, move to Seattle, work in a coffee shop and be a yoga instructor.

But I’m told I am too educated for that now. Silly me, here I was thinking that getting a Master’s degree would open up more doors.

I don’t want to be “wealthy”, I just want to have enough money to do the things that I want to do…to afford the things I want to afford. That’s it. I want to be comfortable and happy. I don’t think that’s too much to ask for, really.

I look up to my philosophy professor from Belmont. She never told us much about her personal life, so what I know about her, I have pieced together to make my ideal Dr. O.

She is in her 40’s or 50’s, never married but had, in her life, encountered and possessed many loves. She has no children and this sometimes creates a void, but she knows that if she truly wanted a child, she could have one.

She has a fantastic body, one that has not by spoiled by age and unhappiness. Life hasn’t gotten the best of her, her spirit or her body.

Which is more than I can say for people half her age.

She has fabulous salt and pepper hair and doesn’t attempt to hide it with colorings and dyes. She expects people to understand and accept her for who she is…not for the person she used to be or wish she would become.

Dr. O taught me that the important questions in life, the questions worth asking, are the ones you can’t answer. The questions that dig deep into your soul and, upon investigating, allow you to discover who you truly are.

For some reason, to me, she embodied both the conservative and the modern view of women. Somehow she was able to reconcile them both…in theory and in practice.

I think what made that possible is that she had found who she was, who she wasn’t and, in turn, was infinitely happy.

The Next Five

I’m 25 now. 25. I just have to keep saying it so that it will sink in. And while it’s sinking in, I’m left here wondering, is this – all that is around me – what I’d dreamed? Is this what I’d wanted? When I pictured my life, when I pictured who I’d be…was it me? Would my five-year old self recognize me? Would she think I was “cool”? Would she want me to be the babysitter? Or would she be disappointed at what her life had mapped out for her in her future? Have I said the right things, made the right decisions? Been nice enough, been sincere enough, loved enough, laughed enough, cried enough?

The past five years have gone by fast…faster than I thought they would…but not faster than every older and wiser woman warned. “You’ve got to enjoy every minute because, one day, you’re going to look back on these times and wish you could have them back.” “Ha” – I scoffed. “You obviously don’t know what I am going through. These times are tough.” And they were.

Five years ago, I was in love. In love, but broken hearted. And I was in the process of transferring colleges to escape. I found solace in the small, religious university that was close to my parents and that only one year prior had caused me so much strife in my efforts to grow up. It wasn’t an easy decision to leave my “real college.”

While I was there, I blossomed into a confident and outgoing woman. I tested my wings and flew a little. I made friends with girls, something I’ve never really been great at doing, and joined a sorority. I asked boys to date parties and formals. I got alcohol poisoning, fell down a flight of stairs and skipped classes (in that order). I went to Victoria’s Secret with my roommate so she could buy scanty lingerie and I graciously slept in a stranger’s room when her boyfriend came into town. My girlfriends and I had midnight walks around campus, sharing stories about boys, classes, parents and the future. We challenged each other to be more, do more and want more. We laughed together and we cried together. We met after classes to sit on the greens outside McClung and people watch. I spent way too much money at Starbucks. And, 9/11 happened and the nation mourned. Frequently, my roommate would wake me up screaming from nightmares after the attacks. I’d go over, wake her up and assure her that she was, in fact, just dreaming. This time.

When I transferred back to Belmont I simply wanted to graduate. Graduate and move on. I worked three jobs to pay for my new private school tuition and took summer classes. Once at Belmont it was obvious that there were other plans in store for me. I got involved in their Greek life, became on orientation leader, got inducted into honor societies and got honored at leadership banquets. I dated a boss’s son and was “let go” when it didn’t work out. I kissed a high-school crush on New Year’s Eve. I started working retail in a place that I would stay with for three more years. But most importantly, I met more girls that I came to love and with whom today, I would be lost without. Girls like Tiffany and Brittany and Abi – who are all so very, very different but who all have one thing in common…they get me. The know me. And they love me no matter what.

And these limited experiences were all in one year. My twentieth year.

All this leads me to wonder, how fast will the next five years go? Does time ever slow down?

Can’t the world just stop.

Stop.

Just for a moment. Let me catch my breath.

Sometimes I feel that if life were an amusement park ride, mine would be operated by the crazy, toothless, liquored-up carnie. He would laugh maniacally as he turned the ride’s gears to go faster and faster, forcing my head back so hard that I couldn’t lift it anymore. The lights of the park would become one long blur, spinning round and round

I’d beg him to stop. Slow down.

Just for a moment. Let me just catch my breath.

But he’d just laugh harder…and perhaps a little spittle would drip down the side of his mouth.

Maybe in the next five I’ll graduate grad school (phew, I better!). Maybe in the next five I’ll fall in love. Maybe I’ll fall out of love. Maybe I’ll give up on love. Maybe I’ll live in Seattle. Maybe I’ll have a dog. Maybe blogging will become passé. Maybe I’ll be back in school getting another degree. Maybe I’ll work in a coffee shop and be the most educated barista there. Maybe in the next five I’ll get married. Maybe we’ll have kids. And maybe we won’t. Maybe he’ll be sterile or I’ll be barren. Maybe I’ll get cancer. Maybe one or both of my parents will die – my dad will be pushing 70 by the end. Maybe I’ll read a novel that speaks to my heart the way none other has. Maybe I’ll write one. And maybe, just maybe, I’ll be the happiest I’ve ever been.

200th Post - It's a milestone!

I read this article on CNN.com while I was sitting in my cubicle eating my lunch today. Delicious Wendy's grilled chicken sandwich, a baked potato and a Diet Coke does the trick and fills the belly.

The article is about dating in the tech-savvy age. The age where you can "Google" your date, look them up on Facebook and/or MySpace and conduct online background checks.

It got me thinking...does all this information at your fingertips take away some of the fun of dating? Does it ruin the mystery that is so much a part of the process when you can learn about someone with a few mouse clicks? Would you sit across the table, nodding your head and feigning interest while the other person tells you things about him/herself...things that you already know?

I'll admit it, I have "Googled" a date.

I did something that I swore I would never do. About two years ago, I gave my number to someone I met at a bar...and then made a date to go out with him.

Just saying this makes me feel skeevy.

I'm sure this way of meeting and dating is fine for some people, and I am sure people can share with me their "happily ever after" endings of relationships started in bars...but it's just not for me. No offense intended...hopefully, none taken.

Anyway, I made a date with this dude, we went out, had a great time. We set another date. I "Googled" the fellow before the next date...and low and behold...he was married. "Was" in the past tense now...but in the oh-so-present tense then.

When I asked him about it, he came up with this long and drawn out (though major props for imagination) story. He tried to tell me that he wasn't married now but yes, he had been married to his friend who wanted to get the money out of her trust fund...and he wanted a green card (he was from Canada)...so they got hitched! Simple enough...

Whatever. Long story short, I didn't go out with him again. Google saved me from dating scum. :)


So, this begs the question...have you done it? Have you "Googled" a date?

Three Thanks

I didn’t post my Thanks last week because I was so sick. Perhaps a few of mine this week should be:

1. Breathing
2. Holding steady a temperature within the 98 degree mark
3. Swallowing without daggers piercing themselves into my throat

Nevertheless, I feel that I should have some Thanks that have nothing to do with my disease. I am more than my disease!

Without further ado…my Three Thanks!

1. Easter with my family (and Abi, who’s like family) – Though they all live here in Nashville and I can see them whenever I want, it’s nice to know that I have somewhere to be on the holidays. It’s nice to have people and places to call “home”. It’s nice that for 25 years my mom has made me an Easter basket. That’s right, be jealous…I still get visited by “The Bunny” every year. It’s tradition!

2. Cooking for family and friends – I love cooking! Perhaps I should have been a chef…nah, I guess you have to have more than just the love of cooking to be a chef. You actually have to be a really good cook. Well, attesting to my skills…I haven’t killed anyone or made anyone sick…not yet.

3. Game night with my ladies –

Cranium (plus) Apples to Apples (equals) Pure Awesomeness!

We pigged out on pizza and all the junk food you haven’t eaten since your mom packed your lunch. E.L. Fudge cookies, Reese's Cookies, Reese's Peanut Butter Eggs (‘tis the season), Chex Mix – Sweet and Salty, chips with sour cream and onion dip, chocolate chess pie….

Ugh, there was more…but I can’t bare to relive it all. We were fat, happy and jovial. And even got a little but of Mean Girls in…

Oh, I'm eating at Virago tonight! They have 1/2 priced martinis and sushi on Mondays! Monday's at Virago come highly recommended by this cat.

This just in!

In groundbreaking news, researchers have found that:

Wives whose husbands help around the house are happier.

Honestly, I'm shocked. I would have never guessed that. Never in a million years...

'Soul mates' cause problems...

An interesting article in Psychology Today. Here's a (long) clip:

"We've done away with a rigid social order, adopting instead an even more onerous obligation: the mandate to find a perfect match. Anything short of this ideal prompts us to ask: Is this all there is? Am I as happy as I should be? Could there be somebody out there who's better for me? As often as not, we answer yes to that last question and fall victim to our own great expectations.

That somebody is, of course, our soul mate, the man or woman who will counter our weaknesses, amplify our strengths and provide the unflagging support and respect that is the essence of a contemporary relationship. The reality is that few marriages or partnerships consistently live up to this ideal. The result is a commitment limbo, in which we care deeply for our partner but keep one stealthy foot out the door of our hearts. In so doing, we subject the relationship to constant review: Would I be happier, smarter, a better person with someone else? It's a painful modern quandary. 'Nothing has produced more unhappiness than the concept of the soul mate,' says Atlanta psychiatrist Frank Pittman.

In fact, argue psychologists and marital advocates, there's no such thing as true compatibility. 'Marriage is a disagreement machine,' says Diane Sollee, founder of the Coalition for Marriage, Family and Couples Education. 'All couples disagree about all the same things. We have a highly romanticized notion that if we were with the right person, we wouldn't fight.' Discord springs eternal over money, kids, sex and leisure time, but psychologist John Gottman has shown that long-term, happily married couples disagree about these things just as much as couples who divorce.

'There is a mythology of 'the wrong person,'' agrees Pittman. 'All marriages are incompatible. All marriages are between people from different families, people who have a different view of things. The magic is to develop binocular vision, to see life through your partner's eyes as well as through your own.'

'So much of what we learn has to do with the self, the ego, rather than giving over the self to things like a relationship,' Kramer says. In our competitive world, we're rewarded for our individual achievements rather than for how we help others. We value independence over cooperation, and sacrifices for values like loyalty and continuity seem foolish. 'I think we get the divorce rate that we deserve as a culture.'

'Marriage is not supposed to make you happy. It is supposed to make you married,' says Pittman. 'When you are all the way in your marriage, you are free to do useful things, become a better person.' A committed relationship allows you to drop pretenses and seductions, expose your weaknesses, be yourself—and know that you will be loved, warts and all. 'A real relationship is the collision of my humanity and yours, in all its joy and limitations,' says Real. 'How partners handle that collision is what determines the quality of their relationship.'

Such a down-to-earth view of marriage is hardly romantic, but that doesn't mean it's not profound: An authentic relationship with another person, says Pittman, is 'one of the first steps toward connecting with the human condition—which is necessary if you're going to become fulfilled as a human being.' If we accept these humble terms, the quest for a soul mate might just be a noble pursuit after all."

SnoopStick

To be honest, this is kinda sick...

Trust is the cornerstone of good relationships. Without it, you have nothing. If your trust for someone is so low that you are stooping to these levels, get out of the relationship. It's probably not worth salvaging...

~*~

"Trust is the cornerstone of any good relationship.

And your honey can trust that you’re looking through his shiznit.

Don’t limit your search to sock drawers and ATM receipts. Find out if your S.O. is truly loyal with the nifty SnoopStick.

The USB flash drive allows you to monitor a computer in real time. Plug it into the machine whose activity you want to keep tabs on and download the software. (PCs only — Mac users are safe on home base.) Then put the contraption into any PC and get directly connected to the computer you’re staking out. Your victim will have no evidence of the trespass, so stick it where you want (and hope that he hasn’t).

You’ll be able to see e-mails (as they’re being read or written) and IM chats, view website histories, and even block access to certain sites. The contraption stores info for twelve months, so even if his little friendship is over, you can dig up the details.

True you’re getting down and dirty.

But you may find out he’s into that."

From Daily Candy

Three Things

1. Waylaid Plans - Sometimes, we have the "best" plans laid out. Sometimes, they don't work out. And sometimes, that's okay.

2. Shooting Stars - I saw one this weekend and made a wish. Nope, don't even ask, I'm not telling you what I wished for.

3. Mother/Daughter Nights - I went and saw "Because I Said So" at the theatre with my friend Abi, her mom and my mom. We went to dinner beforehand and had a great time! Yea for mom bonding!

Disney Princess

I make it a habit to not write about personal matters here, in public domain. But I feel the need to today. I went to a movie, Music and Lyrics, with my friend Abi last night.

To know how subversive this is, you must first know that it is my general rule to not patronize so called “Chick Flicks,” and haven’t done so in years. I find that they give young (and old) girls false hopes, dreams of romantic nights (and knights), and fantastical situations that could never take place in the “real world.”

Disney is one of the leaders helping to sell this image. They are like drug dealers…only they are supplying the world with a brand new crop of old maids who live alone reading romance novels with cats. The picture is drawn of some young, beautiful girl – ripe with innocence to the world and its inhabitants. Something goes terribly wrong, the plot thickens – enter in musical score that no one remembers – and in comes the prince/beast/beggar to save the damsel.

I don’t buy it.

For so long I have been single. Searching for the one man that doesn’t need me; rather, I search for the man that wants me. There is nothing sexy about desperation. There is nothing sexy about someone who simply can’t live without you…right? See, I think this where I had it all wrong.

I don’t want someone to feel nothing when I leave the room. I don’t want someone’s heart to not skip a beat when I come back in.

I want someone who wants (and needs) to spend time with me. Someone who is not apathetic to my existence.

I think “chick flicks” have it all right. Too long I have been subscribing to the way that guys want to love. Becoming a nonromantic (not saying that all guys are nonromantic…Lord knows this isn’t true). But I have come to find out that it’s just not me. I am a romantic.

I want you to live and breathe me. I want you to need me around…not all the time…let’s take this one step at a time, okay? Baby steps. Baby steps.

I want someone who is not afraid to make fun of himself. I can go ahead and tell you that you’re not perfect. And I can go ahead and burst your bubble that I won’t be either. I’m so far from that. I am not a Disney Princess with perfectly coiffed hair and a melodic voice. Okay, that’s a lie…I do have those things…but I don’t have a size 20 waist…and I don’t have a tail either…but hopefully you view that as a plus…

I laugh inappropriately, especially when I am nervous.
I detest public speaking with a vengeance.
Sometimes I snort when I laugh…but it’s quite rare.
I laugh constantly at my own jokes…and often, I am the only one laughing.
I have weird dietary concerns.
I am allergic to detergent.
I’m bad about calling people back.
I’m bad about calling people in general.
I don’t often say what I am really feeling.
I like designer things…and am somewhat materialistic.
I smell everything. All the time.
I’m loyal to a fault.
I always put on a happy face…no matter what.

I want you to show me the world…shining, shimmering, splendid. (Aladdin reference, anyone? Anyone?)

I want you to giddily explain to your friends that you’ve met the girl of your dreams and not care when they make fun of you…because you know deep down…they’re all just jealous.

But most of all, I want you to try. Try to win my affection. Don’t assume you have it. And don’t be settled on the fact that just because you do, it can’t be taken away.

I want you to make me laugh and make me cry. It’s okay. Without these emotions we really cease to truly exist.

I want you to hear a song on the radio and think to yourself how perfectly those lyrics pen the words that describe the way you feel at that exact moment.

I want you to dream about me at night. I want you to be afraid to say those three important words, but you do anyway.

I want you to not mind driving to where I live, because you know it will be worth it when you get here. I want you to come and see me when I am sick/depressed/stressed…and bring something over to make me smile.

I want you to reach for my hand and hold it tight. Hold it like you don’t want to let it go.

I want you to respect my need for space. I’m an only child…I had lots and lots of space…and time by myself growing up.

Forget apathy. Forget repressed emotions. Forget the should haves and the wanted tos.

Sweep me off my feet – I won’t settle for anything less…

So, ladies and gentlemen…here’s to passion. Here’s to mad love. Here’s to not giving up until you find it.